Cuss-tumour Care

Press confirm to complete the transaction. Somehow it read press confirm and we will screw you. I can sense these things. But sensing is one thing and knowing is other. If we knew everything we sensed, things would make much more sense. Anyways.

I confirmed. And i wait.

5 seconds gone.

I haven’t realised yet that I’ve taken the ride. My brain works with a lag of 5 seconds. If there was a way to delete those 5 seconds in every conversation i have had, i would be the most quick witted person ever. But that is not how those 5 seconds work. So I stare at my screen like a dim-witted retard.

Nothing happens.

Now it clicks. Brain starts to connect logically the events that have taken place in last 5 seconds.

I pressed confirm. Transaction was made. Money was debited. The TICKETS should have been booked. Simple silly.

Another 5 sec lag.

Tickets should have been booked. But that doesn’t look like the ticket page.

Then what is it?

It says TRANSACTION FAILED, TRY AGAIN.

Brain is clueless. But knows it’s duty. It has to come with the answer. What next is the question.

Neurons are running helter-skelter. Right brain left brain. Every freaking corner.

This is called panic. Not a very profound situation to panic but 4745 is decent sum of hard earned money, which looks like, have been gobbled up by the nexus of Makemytrip and HDFC bank.

Brain as useless as it might be is a clever organ. It knows how to save it’s arse without delivering. RELAX it says. Calm down. Things are totally under control. Whose control??? I ask nervously. That is not important, Brain replies. This gives those neurons time to make up some response. Go to the website and look for the customer care option. I do like an obedient child. Dial the number and you will get your money back. Everything is under control. I take a sigh of relief. If not for my brilliant brain i would have been a dead man.

I dial. Computer lady replies, “Welcome to Makemytrip. We make memories unlimited”. Do not trust any lady who says this. Even if she’s a computer. I wait impatiently. She continues,” dial 1 for ...dial 3..dial 123 for.....”. I look clueless-ly at my brain. I get an out-of-office reply. I’ll have to do it myself. I dial 3. Computer lady, “dial -56 for...dial -55 for....dial 103 for..”. In a desperate attempt to save myself from the embarrassment of my inability to decipher large chunk of numbers, I disconnect. I need time to regroup. I must be more prepared. I look at my brain again. It winks and shows a thumbs up. I dial again. Computer lady, “dial 1 for...dial 2 for....”. I follow intently. I dial every freaking number she tells me to with the hope that finally she will say dial 1 to talk to our customer care executive. After 5 mins and dialling all the even, odd, prime, rational, irrational numbers, I look at my phone screen. It reads f#78% u b$%322$%!.

I give up. Welcome to Makemytrip and we will take you for a ride. After all we make memories unlimited.